Self-Care in the Context of Anti-Racism Work
Blog post written by Lama El-Hanan, Straight Up Health
White people occupy a position of social, political, and economic advantage within Canada due to our country’s history of racism and settler-colonialism. Because Whiteness has been established as the cultural norm, many of us have never had to think critically about race and how heavily it impacts the lives of racialized communities and Black communities in particular. But the tragic murders of Black folks at the hands of police in recent weeks have triggered waves of protests and social unrest that have brought the issue of anti-Black racism to the forefront of our national discourse. These protests are raising our awareness about the often fatal consequences of anti-Black racism and alerting us towards the urgency of doing something about it. Many of us are feeling newly inspired to learn about racism and get involved in anti-racism efforts. We are fortunate to live in a time when informative and reliable resources on anti-racism are accessible and readily available. However, it is easy to lose sight of ourselves in this deluge of new information, actions, and initiatives. Prioritizing self-care is sometimes seen as selfish and self-indulgent, especially in these times. Perhaps this is because the term is a misnomer in some ways. Self-care can be broadly defined as the actions we take to meet our emotional, social or physical needs. However, although they are focused on the self, these actions are precisely what allow us to show up meaningfully and effectively for our communities. As the saying goes, you cannot pour from an empty cup. Self-care, therefore, can also be understood as a means of filling our cup so that we are able to give to others. We should take care of ourselves precisely because it allows us to better care for our communities. Anti-racism work is uncomfortable, difficult, and frustrating and those who do it are prone to burnout. Given this, and the urgency of addressing anti-Black racism in Canada and the world, it is important to think about what self-care looks like for White people in the context of anti-racism work.
Feeling and Processing Uncomfortable Emotions
Self-care is often glamorized in popular culture as an escapist indulgence in the form of chocolates and bubble baths. But while pleasure and joy are important aspects of self-care, a lot of the self-care we do is actually quite uncomfortable and difficult. A critical part of taking care of ourselves is emotional self-care, which involves allowing ourselves to experience our emotions without judgement and process what we are going through. Taking responsibility for our emotional well-being allows us to be better listeners and have difficult conversations around race and racism. Crucially, emotional self-care enables us to build up our tolerance for racial stress. Because White people have not had to have tough discussions about race, we are often not used to sitting with the difficult emotions that accompany them. Learning about racism and your complicity in it can be a painful reckoning for many White people. It is likely to stir up feelings of guilt, shame, fear, anger, frustration, shock and grief. This causes us to become defensive when we are accused of being racist or implicated in systems of racial oppression. We may minimize, deny, or dismiss the experiences of people of colour in an effort to avoid our own uncomfortable emotions. This can be very hurtful and traumatizing to racialized individuals. By allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and making an effort to sit with and process these challenging emotions rather than suppressing them, we will be better able to really listen to the perspectives of racialized people and show up to conversations about racial justice.
Make a practice of feeling rather than suppressing your emotions. Become a mindful observer, noticing your emotions and where you feel them in your body. Take a curious and non-judgemental stance relative to them. As the 13th century Persian poet Rumi writes in his poem The Guest House, we should welcome and honour even the most uncomfortable emotions. Although they may be unruly guests, they are often messengers that signal something of importance. For instance, recent protests have spurred discussions about racial oppression that may cause us to feel guilty. But this guilt is also what spurs many people into taking action against racism and systemic injustice. Self-reflective activities such as journaling and debriefing with other White people doing anti-racism work are great ways to practice facing and processing difficult emotions.
Prioritizing Your Mental Health
Another critical aspect of self-care in the context of anti-racism work is participating in ways that honour and support your mental health. This can mean creating a routine and structure around how we consume information related to racism. The incessant stream of images and headlines about anti-Black violence is highly traumatic for Black communities. However, as empathetic beings, they can be upsetting to anyone regardless of their race. Constant headlines and images of despair and grief are likely to cause you to burnout, especially if you are facing your own mental health challenges. Be mindful of the effect the media you consume can have on your mental health. Instead of constantly scrolling through social media, be intentional about carving out time to regularly engage with news media so that you are able to stay up to date on any new information or actions that are happening. Another way to support your mental health as you do anti-racism work is to participate in ways that honour your strengths and limitations. Perhaps your social anxiety makes it difficult to attend a protest or sit-in without having a panic attack. You can still contribute to these protests by creating signs and banners for those who would like to attend. By pacing yourself and acknowledging your strengths and limitations, you are much less likely to burnout. This means that you can continue to show up in the struggle for racial justice--a struggle which will almost certainly be a marathon rather than a sprint.
Practising Self-Compassion and Failing Forward
It is impossible to be a White person doing anti-racism work and not make several mistakes. It is expected that you will say and do the wrong thing on occasion. That is part of the learning and unlearning process. Practising self-compassion allows us to better receive criticism and learn from our mistakes. It is important to take a self-improvement rather than critical mindset, seeing our mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow. If we expect ourselves to always be perfect, we will never be ready to show up for racial justice. The urgency of ending anti-Black racism means that we do not have that luxury. By telling ourselves that it is okay to fail and that we can and will improve, we encourage ourselves to get up and try again when we fall. When every failure becomes an opportunity to learn, our understanding of anti-racism and our activism will continually deepen and evolve.
Cultivating Optimism and Building Community
Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither were our country’s systems of racial oppression. This means that dismantling them is likely to be a life-long fight for us. It is easy to become discouraged and frustrated when faced with such a gargantuan task as ending racism, so it is important to cultivate joy, optimism and hope in the context of anti-racism work. By joining communities of people who are committed to racial justice both off and online, we are able to build networks of solidarity and friendship as we push for change. These relationships enable us to avoid burnout by providing social support and meaningful connections and inspiring us to continue to push forward through the commitment and dedication of others.